Last year I went to South by Southwest (SXSW), a huge music festival in Austin. It’s grown to include a technology conference, film festival, and basically anything that can be prefaced with SXSW and attract hipsters: SXSWedu, SXSW Eco, SXSW Elderberry Liquor Tasting, and SXSW Big Lebowski Clothing Expo. Official disclaimer: I made up the last two.
I stayed with my friend who knows the city inside and out, and she claimed we did not need to buy expensive tickets to enjoy the music and atmosphere. She was totally right. Sponsored parties were EVERYWHERE, drinks were free, and the music was incredible. If you simply sold your soul and email address to Dickies (the company that makes work pants that simultaneously appeal to my dad and 21 year old college kids), the company fed you cold street tacos and syrupy Mikes Hard Lemonade until you got sugar sick and almost threw up. FOR FREE! Rock on!
We had a blast, and I’m not kidding about that.
The free bands were awesome, and we could come and go as we pleased. One particular girl group took it all the way, jumping on people, disregarding undergarments as to not restrain natural, God-given lady humps, and foregoing deodorant to keep it really real. These were not the kind of gals to be fettered by contrived, conventional hygiene standards.
This chick went at it like a honey badger.
In fact, Spanx should definitely NOT sponsor SXSW. Austin actually has a ban on elastic undergarments for women. However, the city does issue compression biker shorts to every man over 40. We can thank Lance Armstrong for that.
These are all made for men.
So that’s the kind of entertainment you’re missing by not being at SXSW this week.
This is not from Austin, but it was too good to pass up:
The line between biker shorts and porn is very fine.
For more FREE entertainment, please enjoy these photos from FurHatWorld.com:
Please take a moment to appreciate all his sexy faces.
"I'm mischievous outside but tender inside."
"Please take me to bed."
He's going to fight in the next Rocky movie: Siberia vs. Philly.
The Tudors on Showtime used this in wardrobe.
This one deserves to be shown again.
I’ve looked at these pics for days now, and this guy still warms my heart with a fit of giggles every time. I hope he does the same for you!
Tell Austin to please be more careful. A combination of free tacos, free Mike’s Lemonade, free music, Dickies and un-toed camels all in one place could surely cause the planets to come out of alignment.
Sounds like a rockin time !
Hahaha! Austin is a rockin’ time! While all the things listed do endanger planetary alignment, the universe allows the city to thrive because Austin has the best food trailers in the galaxy. Even if you hate camel toe and Dickies, Austin is worth a visit just for the food!
I’m gonna go out on a limb and say the woman in that photo is keeping it a teense TOO real. Nobody wants that much Real.
She put her real all over anybody within 10 feet of the stage. I was scared.
Umm…how has nobody commented on the fur hat world photos? I’m in hysterics laughing at my computer. I love your witty captions. I can’t get over the one with the body still attached to it. That HAS to be a joke.
Why thank you! Sadly, I really want to order one of those hats now. Maybe for Halloween? It’s not cold enough in Texas to wear one with a straight face at any other time. Fur hats may be the only good reason to move to a colder place.